Hohoho Merry Xmas

I hear your heart beat to the beat of the drums
Oh what a shame that you came here with someone
So while you're here in my arms,
Let's make the most of the night like we're gonna die young

This rings in my head all the time 

hellos my dear blog. :)

im watching my family watch hk drama while im being anti-social in my room typing away. lol

and thats pretty much how i spend my christmas & PH.

BUT its okay because i caught JC's cz12 yesterday with my family members at midnight (:

And it was to my liking though i feel that it can be much better.

still i like the concept and jc's fighting as always.

Its been a pretty long time and its already the last week of my clinical attachment.

It has been a wonderful experience and i have written quite a few reflections about it already so i shall not repeat them here :>

So the pictures generally speak what i had been doing while my family was away

& so glad they are back safe and sound and the world didn't end xD

yesh, so my dear became my chef and whipped french toast breakie for me but after few mouths that boy got a sorethroat and couldnt eat anymore haha

yes this sinful looking thing comes from swensens and the cold vanilla with the burning brownie is the best i've ever had :D

The beautiful and heartwarming christmas decoration at the nursing home (:

so recently, i have been scouting for some make up products and experimenting them. Its a difficult thing to be pretty. or maybe the process is difficult so i respect them !

 Eating proper tang yuan for the first time. My dear made this and though its pre-made but the ginger soup was good and i really love the peanut one.

 One interesting thing done during stayover at rosy's house. She bought the lights from ikea and it was a awesome process setting it up :D i love DIY

Crap ignore the bad skin condition and the uneven teeth. YEAH its xmas season and even my teeth feels the same :>

 Saturday when i was out with predators at orchard watching the night lights again :) yet not getting bored of it

Our drinks at TCC. Alan wee can't stop playing with my little bear. hahaha

More evidence and motivation to becoming a pretty girl. All the lotions,moisturisers,lip balm, perfume and bb cream and more...

 And this ! My christmas gifts. WOW they are mostly from china :) so many cheap loots makes me so happy. some from love and nursing friends :D AWWWWWW.

This is my ah gong's wound dressing set! his finally home safe and sound. This is me trying to dress his wound BUT HMMMMMM he sounds more experienced than me :'( try harder next time *pats*

 The most innovative present i received for xmas this year HAHAH. Thanks fel for the jelly although it doesnt look pretty here BUT its good really good and its really cute that she even bought the mould for merry xmas words :D so touched and pretty ~

and thats about it !

can't wait for my holiday to come officially Made a list of stuff to do :D

and i really love red head GONNA GET IT next year for my birthday WHEEHEE

and this depicts how i feel these days xD

maybe its nearing the end of 2012 thats why 

Looking for some trouble tonight
Take my hand, I'll show you the wild, side
Like it's the last night of our lives
We'll keep dancing till we die

December

And so, the first week of december has been really hectic and exhausting and tougher to pass than usual. There was fun, laughter, tears and quarrels.
Bringing you through my week:

Crys, yx and i visited legoland and adilah on 3rd and 4th dec ! (:

It was a crazy and magical journey alright. NOT EXAGGERATING!!!

2 days never felt so long before.

From the late night supper to the late night speed rides and late night movie.

It felt good not having any restrictions for once but i was like a coward in the unfamiliar country.

it then dawn upon me how brave my friend was to choose to stay away from her country, her familiar home,her family. Thats probably one hard decision i am never brave enough to make. 

Made full use of our time there so the trip was definitely worthwhile.

Legoland was better than i expected.

Maybe the inner child in me arose after a long long time because i was amazed at the lego figures, EVERY kiddy rides even though we were barred from them :/ , disregarded any pride and went ahead to snap photos to store every memory to remember this day. haha This may be due to the movie we caught last night - Rise of the guardian was full of positivity and i was so motivated and lifted from inside. So i could say i enjoyed it cause it brought smiles to my face and also my heart too ! even though i was supposed to be way too old for it. BUT who says adults can't enjoy kiddy movies if they are good too yeah. The creativity of the animations awed me most (:

Fantasy films are getting better and better! i can't wait for more of it to come 

And after a close shave, we managed to arrive at sg on 4th dec at night so i had the opportunity to bunk in yx's room since her roomie wasn't in !

i would totally stay in hostel if the hostel are double occupancy and look like hers.

I totally adore the design, i have to say the standard is better than that of my room :'(

The experience was awesome but i don't think i can ( want to ) adapt to it in long term.

love my humble abode too much :D

so on the 5th when i finally returned home, thought my body was going to fall into pieces already.

Amazingly, i still had energy to go for movie and strolled with pearl and sy from dhoby to somerset :D!

WA took photo of lights and the streets. 

I really love to adventure aimlessly like this! stress free baby ~

and zoom zoom to thurs, i had a kbox and shopping date with my sis and jy 

super loving my cheap cheapt knit top from h&m. its so bling and fashionable yet so cosy at the same time.

Couldnt have survived the chill without you ~

3h was so little! next time 5h is the minimum!

haha and it was the first time i bought less than my sissy.

Both aquarius kept ganging up to buy the same clothing so they get more discounts !

what is this !!!!!!!! haha but so happy that we are all happy with our lobang !

of course, my mummy is the most unhappy cause i added like 3kg of NEW clothes to the washing machine so she nagged and nagged and nagged :O

OH and it was so hectic i forgot i managed to squeezed in a breakfast date with fel and rid in the morning. WA CUI MAX. but u know big breakfast have the ability to make u feel BIGGG again haha :D

Friday, finally i can't stand my non stop nom nom lifestyle without a proper output.

NO swim NO dance NO yoga NO run.

WHAT IS THIS. 

so YIPPPEEE i tagged along my sis her gf to the gym at pasir ris! 

i like i there.

Initially, i was so afraid when i started running i would collapsed in a heart attack cause the food accumulated over the weak was oily and sinful :(

BUT HENG AH. gym-ed for around 2h and a little less.

In the end we headed to ws for pepperlunch -.-

at least i eat with less guilt this time.

AHYO so hard to be human o_o

Saturday was my sissy's band concert! 

dear ps-ed me :'( but lucky i got my dad mum germ and aunt.

whee missed the school and the atmosphere.

and i realised that i always forget to live in the present moment.

im always comparing the past or thinking of the future.

and i never look at the positive parts but focus mostly on negative ideas.

SO HMMM :( bad bad must change !

Not forgetting to mention my morning was fruitful and i never regretted going for volunteer work.

:) exhausting but u know the effort and time was worthwhile because that intangible return is an indescribable feeling but i know it energises you, affirms that you are a good person, makes your more confident and positive.And i enjoy the taste of it :D

alright i got to stop here because i don't get to nua around on a sunday,

heading to joc house to meet up for xq birthday and more gossiping and catching up.

I tried to summarise it. Im serious so much details and words left unsaid.

BUT WHY IS IT STILL SO LONG>< 

wish me luck for clinicals :O

i wanna go china with u all tooo :( BOOO

Climax

These tunes keep replaying in my mind ~

pink try & usher's climax 

i love leory's version. guess its the sound of the acoustic guitar and his voice.

the lyrics are super emotional, but i am not. Somehow i love how sad it sounds very real, very applicable. EKKKK why can't i just love happier songs.

Going nowhere fast we've reached the climax

We're together now we undone

wont commit so we choose to run away

do we separate

dont wanna give in so we both gave up

wont take it back its to late we reach the climax

 -------Climax, Usher

The title is apt for what i'm going through now.

I guess its the climax of semester 1 now because i'm in the midst of my first university exams.

And so i was like ah, this is what a university exams look like.

I can't help but compare with those that i have seen in movies. Feels (atmosphere) is roughly the same but looks far worse than on screen. It's different from jc and secondary school. Same tables, chairs and arrangement but there is more implants of caucasian now haha ! Alright i'm just kidding but it does alter the atmosphere of the exams. And in university we are able to wear slippers to exams. Okay i don't know why i'm so particular about the footwear but it doesn't feel very important when you wear slippers you know. Like it ain't serious enough for you to dress properly. Anyways, the important thing is that 2 papers down and 2 more to go! Well truthfully, i really want to do well but it is too tough to gauge. Nevermind 26th december will soon arrive we'll see what can be done in future. :D 

And post exams, i guess i will be hitting a greater climax.

I've got A WEEK (only) to play. Like really play. i've work pretty hard for the past 14 weeks and so i deserve the rest. :D May not have done an awesome job but i put in mostly my best and it was a good feeling with no regrets ! Up till now i think its true that things works best when its in controlled. Enjoy that feeling ~ 

And so to make my play more interesting i have diligently done my homework and thinking to what i wanna achieve during this holidays. HAHA so hs, hate to take breaks. shall share maybe it inspires us to relax in such manner too! So, thanks to friends recommendations and bloggers update, it has successfully made me adamant to hunt for good food this holidays. maybe after tasting good food, i would be motivate to make them one day! So input and no output is no good cause it isn't balance right. I have learnt we need 3-5h a week for moderate intense exercise. Since swimming aint possible now and yoga is coming to an end soon :'( i think i can only rely on jogging and dance :> i absolutely can't wait. Can u sense my excitement while i'm typing this cause i've missed dance for 2-3 weeks and my body feels like a robot. Climbing stairs at kr mrt is a toll for me . i can feel my thighs loose and my gluteus maximus getting to maximum size each day :'( And retail therapy is a cure for my exam trauma and so many movies that i need to catch ! i hope my allowance is sufficient to tahan these expenditure!! Yippee and gathering catching up and outings for chilling. sounds like a plan baby ~ :D OOOO and touch my guitar !!! shall keep the excitement going. Wow the years coming to an end again! Ze me kuai!!!!!!!!! 

Funny how the heart can be so deceiving 

More than just a couple of times

Why do we fall in love easy

Even when its not right

---------try, Pink

Now playing : A thousand years part 2, its my trailer for breaking dawn part 2.which means its guitar time again!! I heard its good, hope it will be cause the movies have been disappointing for me so far :/ giving it once last chance . 

Little things

Your hand fits in mine like it's made just for me 
but bear this mind it was meant to be 
and i'm joining up the dots with the freckles on your cheeks
and it all makes sense to me

i know you've never loved the crinkles by your eyes when you smile, 
you've never loved your stomach or your thighs 
the dimples in your back at the bottom of your spine 
But i'll love them endlessly 

I won't let this little things slip out of my mouth 
But if i do, it's you, oh it's you, they add up to 
i'm in love with you and all these little things

You can't go to bed without a cup of tea
maybe that's the reason that you talk in your sleep
and all those conversations are the secrets that i keep 
though it makes no sense to me 

i know you've never loved the sound of your voice on tape 
you never want to know how much you weigh 
you still have to squeeze into your jeans
but you're perfect to me 

i won't let this little things slips out of my mouth
But if it's true, it's you, it's you, they add up to
I'm in love with you and all these little things 

you never love yourself half as much as i love you 
you'll never treat yourself right darling but i want you to 
if i let you know, i'm here for you
maybe you'll love yourself like i love you oh

i've just let these little things slips out of my mouth 
because it's you, oh it's you, it's you they add up to 
and i'm in love with you (all these little things) 
I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth 
but if it's true, it's you, it's you they add up to 
I'm in love with you, and all your little things.

Although it isn't written in the asian context cause we've got less/no freckles and the absence of crinkles but i get the gist of it. 
And its really thoughtful when someone gets reminded of you when they chance upon such music. :')

okay, on the downside.
im procrastinating. oh damn oh damn.
After self pampering i hope my heart and mind would work hand in hand for the week ahead.
Its the finals for sem 1.
And Hs you can't lose it alright!
gambateh
Gonna keep fit after the exams, can't stand my body shape now (all lose and flaccid  -.-)
Shall not blabber too much cause this post is dedicated to the one whom intro-ed the song to me 
:)

NINETEEN

This was supposed to be posted on my birthdate.
But university life and academic datelines kept me busy till now.
So warning : i'm lazy to split this post into several posts. So i shall me clumped it here with my oh so awesome summarising skills. So, i'm sorry if everything sounds so insincere and touch-and-go. U know feelings and memories fade -impermanence- with time but i can assure my loved ones that the moment of bliss was truly felt and sincerely appreciated with gratitude in my heart if i weren't able to express it well enough with my inept vocab or expressions :)

25/10 Thurs :
Celebrated my early birthday dinner with da braker and a wifey. :')
Never fail to laugh like a hysterical lady with them :D
The view that night was awesome.
and the shopping with wifey too. A pity my other half wasn't there.
But it's sufficient to see most of their faces even after 2 years after graduating from dmn!
You know the feeling of meeting old pals feeling all comfortable and warmed-up all over again.

26/10Fri:
Had our inaugural steamboat at pearl's house. Was shopping for ingredients in the morning like aunties :D Hmm got to improve on my culinary skills if not don't need to jia chu qu le! and i learnt how to appreciate my mummy's fine culinary skills after this xD
Finally, i spent my vouchers at kikki k with sy ! :D i must say thanks for some advices. Still working on it still figuring things out and it really depends on my mood sometimes. HAHA.
Afterwards, visited my aunt at the hospital. okay i must say its not very nice to be applying my nursing skills during the hospital visit. but i paid attention to the oxygen therapy, nasogastric tube feeding, pressure ulcers, embolism stockings when i was in the room. I'm amazed at how applicable my nursing clinical skills are and i actually felt a sensed of relieved. of course i had to step out of my comfort zone to provide some form of care. So with my lack knowledge and experience, my only form of support for my aunt was to apply moisturiser which would maintain her skin integrity. i believe therapeutic touch does help. Even though she's gone but i believe, she left well. Her departure reminds me how fragile our lives can be and i realise that i'm starting to worry at every little thing thats happening around me thats beyond my control. Instead maybe i should be grabbing on any opportunity available to make the best out of adversity.

27/10Sat:
And so instead of receiving, i had a feeling that i had to reciprocate these fortunate givings to someone else and not be the one receiving endlessly. HAHA and i'm so glad i found a way to pass on these kindness from others by volunteering . So coincidentally, nusbs had a volunteer event on saturday. I don't know what pushed me to sign up for the event on my own. I guessed i really wanted to do something more meaningful. Lol i almost regretted when we gathered at eunos to find out that we are delivering the food items to boon lay and so that means i have to train home from boon lay when the event ends. After manually dragging/ carrying/lifting the food items to the nearest carpark or flat, i swear my biceps/ triceps/ extensors/ flexor or whatever muscles you can find on my body increased in tone. haha but physical suffering actually made me feel that i place in effort during the entire event .

Amazing that i could still met dear to get a hair cut together.
That night there was an ongoing dans festival at esplanade.
At first i thought i had to go down alone. But my dear miraculously could go out on a sat night so why not.
We or maybe only me enjoyed the music and the lessons
but still so shy to move ! :x
Lol took photo with 'GAHO' too  :D

Sun:
i think i was re-organizing and studying and i came across A SUPER SUPER Long word. I bet it isnt a word. So amazed by it cause i tried to pronounce it for 3x?

29/10 mon:
In short its school with sy and pearl >> dear >> Tut 2 (dont like calling tut 2 too formal leh ) >> surprise visit from fel :') >> Dance plus my dear jia ying xD >> family.
What could be better than this right. Being able to see all my cherished and loved ones in a day (:
so celebrating or growing old may not be a bad thing afterall cause i get to pause to see and hear from my dear ones once again in the midst of my busy life and that gives me a lot a lot of strength. I DONT MIND GROWING OLDER EVERYDAY. :>

31/10 wed:
I shall make a special mention as it was my last dance lesson in nus FOR THE SEM & we had audition for an item next year. (: yeap i can't wait for practice to commence already :D. get to know some of dance mates even better !! and perform on stage for the first time?? unsure if that might actually happen because my mum is kind of not kind of BUT REALLY against it. still, hs won't let such golden opportunity past right by alright. >:D REBEL hs revive again.

1/11 thurs:
Oh man, it was time for poster submission. personally, this is a pretty significant event as it marks the end of our IPE project with the pharmacy students. initially, i was hesitant and skeptical of our capabilities and whether this would actually work out. Plus you know my over-paranoid- brain would stress me consistently and worry me till no end and general stereotypes did hindered my perceptions towards them. When the project ended, i actually missed them. haha i enjoyed working with them even if they didn't. And in fact there was a lot to thank them for. if not for them, mj and i would prolly be lost sheeps still 'mehh-ing' away. so i was glad it ended well regardless of the result we receive. Up till now we haven't deleted the 'the seal project' group you know xD.

fast forward to 5/11(week 12):
haha very wonderful to have dear going to school and back home with me cause our timetable are in sync. AND its damn rare. So i was actually PARANOID again for his over acting kindness. bad habit hs. haha sometimes i should just TAKE IT AS IT IS and not think so much or make ridiculous self assumption yea. Anyway it was grateful how he waited for me for dance to end, how he intro-ed makisan and we still haven't decide on our vans. GRRRRRRRR. well, great time spent. No over attachment no over attachment

Another significant milestone for me! had our second Fon pratical test. WHOOHOOHOO.
This time i was arranged to be in the first slot.
Guess what i love the first slot. less waiting time and in fact i felt less anxious as compared to the previous times. :D went off to meet mama and family <3 p="p">
and today was awesome quality time spent again :D with complete circle of datrololol with wk! except for dua pai jq !!!!!! pissed but its alright still got wifey number 2 birthday :D. love coco such adorable little thing i feel like owning one too. I will be a bad pet owner as i can forsee :O awesome time, aweseome company and awesome cake !!!! whee can't wait for holiday with them . This time im not going to miss it no matter what !

And Oh no i'm falling in love with song jong ki and i do not know why.
i just find him so damn cute and irresistible to watch!!!

OH my goodness so long o_O HEHE but i feel good already.
I pray for good health and smiles for everybody wheeeee~
will be back when final ca's are over :D
miss ya and miss me !
Love, shan

Cope/Coping

  
Pictures shall illustrate the direction of my post today.
AND so tada completed my first presentation ever in Nursing.
That explains why we are clad so formally that it even makes me feel weird.
I enjoyed the process. Although I'm not sure how the teacher would perceive the outcome, i roughly have an idea how it would turn out already.

In the mean time, i should deserve and self proclaim a short break till next week.
As the saying goes, you need to rest to go further. I strongly believe in that which explains the photo of rooftop prince in my post.
Yes, among the list of korean dramas, i have chosen this after reading many reviews.
Im afraid of being suck into the process of fantasising, idoling and crushing on them but its definitely the best way to relieve stress (:

recab recab !

last week met up with 18/10 for dinner and pool.

hahah was upset with my aiming skills.

gotta go visit the place more( i sound like an bad girl) , the game is kinda exciting and addictive.

But my motive is to improve skills :>

As usual the guys dont stop talking about army so the ladies had to carry on with uni.

heard their complains on their courses. i feel fortunate that i love mine. of course i know they will come to love their course soon. Im starting to feel that these people are those whom i can trust, lean on and fall in love with (: Like see how we camwhore like nobody's business on the train. people thought we were filming some mv.

Anyways feel like taking some time off for myself this weekend.

You know i never knew i speak as if im rushing off to somewhere or super excitedly every moment

and its kinda making people around me feel exhausted or irritated?

so maybe i should start looking into why i do so and how to go about changing it.

but if i change would it be too dull.

You see i have issues communicating even with norm. people.

so hmmm wouldn't it be even tougher if the convo is just about to get even more boring

Nevermind take it as it comes.

everyday is different and everyday im different.

secretly want to perform even though im going against your ground rules.

watching alex's chereo and reading picoult's abstract does wonders whenever i'm in a not so good state.

its comforting (:

But the thought of upcoming unpleasant even which will still befall even if i pray fervently is disappointing and im still figuring a coping mechanism for it which explains my short getaway.

haha so happy when i manage to fork out time for the display along NUH about human trafficking. goodness learnt quite a bit from the exhibition !

awareness is created so now how? 

theres a gap between how knowing this matter exist enable us to help them.

K i still have classes tomorrow.

But i'm so looking forward to the weekend for my own time.

just me, myself & i

have a happy weekend ahead ~

 and this is my beloved Mugger chan (:

This Kiss

You know i really like this song.
But after learning about the lyrics i still like it as much. WAHAHAH.
well the tune's really retro but the lyrics is about flirting.
Anyways, doesn't matter cause its a sweet tune to hum too.

I'm supposed to be finishing up my A&P tut and also my REFLECTION.
BUT SEE WHOS's HERE????
Goodness i cant stop myself from procrastinating cause time seems SO MUCH when i see it now.
Trying to deceive myself here yo.

There's a special reason why I'm here todays! and the only reason maybe.
well, cause recently i found out my best friend whom i found in nursing blogs too.
Like hello, who still blogs in this era? haha. Not saying its unpopular but its rare cause there are many competitive social media platforms out there.Technology gets obsolete fast these days.
Love reading blogs because love knowing what kind of person u are without having to garner the courage to ask for an answer. Because its the same for me. I wouldn't say some matters unless you ask me . Yet putting it down here is never a problem for me.Thats why i'm still sticking to blogger till the end. :)

School's this week is less hectic. its like a descending slope on a curve.
Im glad we started on the poster today. Well it was something that i looked forward too throughout the entire project. HAHA. i know thats mean. Im not trying to say Art's my forte rather i putting forth that communication is never my item. Art makes me happy. Its a carefree world on its own and it has no restrictions. I can be me and feel me when i'm in there. Let's just say its the perfect world i would be.

Okay before boring you with my aimless ranting that probably repeats weekly.
Lets just say how i got STINKY. Okay, we got it at Craftholics. Its a shop located in Bugis plus.
I have walked past it several times and held the doll in my hands but there was never a moment or reason why i had to buy it and my pocket wasn't allowing me too. The buy was an impromptu decision. And u know how much i love Impromptus right cause it exciting, its changing, its special, it ain't the normal or the usual. But we took super long to choose it like choosing names for children. we couldnt decide on the size (they come in different lengths and horizontal widths) and definitely different price. Most importantly its takes both crave to get it or else WHAT FOR BUY IT. true that there were several designs to pick from and every one of them looks cute in their own way !(: so i forgo a dress for stinky(monkey) and rabbit(mugger chan) HAHA. Please don't laugh at the names. i feel that an identity should be given so it isn't like any other monkey or rabbit cause it belongs to us and ours only. 2 for 25 only. Prices are subjective. Worth the grab (: nice to cuddle. the fur is really soft hehehehhee. LOVE IT. my favourite name for days already feels good to even just chant it.

and I'm eyeing on a pair of VANS that doesn't have my feet size why :'(

Stinky 

ps: don't over indulge in life and miss out on friends. sigh. why cant i just be ultra sociable and just talk without having to think. See the problem is recurring again.

First Reflection.

Today at this untimely hour i am proud announced that i have finished my first REFLECTION. people must be wondering oh so its just a reflection.HA. But this ain't the ordinary reflection you jot down in your mini journals everyday and thrash it aside. Its more than just description. Still amazed at how it was possible for me to churn out the 1500 word essay for a week -,- (NOT VERY PROUD TO MENTION). Well at least i made use of GIBB's cycle and URH threw in literature to support my analysis haha :D. Everything sounds as chim as it may be but i believe the main takeaway from the entire chore (not really, pretty enjoyable at moments) was to become more aware of myself and it works super well. Because once i embarked on this, many events in my life became reflection-worth already. Anyways, yeah a pity this first piece of work holds 50% of the module mark and im obviously not gonna get the best grade cause you know my english and you know its the first time yeah. Like my practical shoo total disaster. On the bright side, i still deserved a pat since i managed to churn it out in time and trudge through the bad bowel and flu days !!! IT WASNT EASY AT ALLLLLL. and you know what the best part is : I've got another 1500 essay to write by next monday for FON. the trolled face totally. Writing reflections makes me happy (maybe not this long) it feels as if im a step closer to nursing already (: you know year one is like the time to settle down and adapt and taste all the shit you have never tasted in your life. Thats what i feel like now. They throw reflections at you, they throw simulation lab sessions at you, they make u work with other faculty students in projects, they make u present. truthfully, to some this may never be an issue. But personally, its a HUGE issue for me. So many first times in shortly 2 months of school. i dislike 'first times' because they give me butterflies in my tummy but i have to de-sensitize my fears so that they no longer are to me. and DID YOU KNOW? i missed my guitar dinner :'( HOW COULD I right. it was such a rare occasion. Until now i still bitterly blame myself partly for missing the dinner its like spoiling mood of the others. Okay so after this outburst, i should head for my sleep. Slept a lot during the weekends felt that my face instantly lifted and beautified when i woke up.
Feels a sense of accomplishment when i see a big chunk of words now !

Skulls

Skulls

Crayon

Shall start of the post with an interesting photo !

whee they aint normal skulls ! they are made of lego bricks by Nathan sawaya.

Normally i'm not really artsy but when inspiring things come along like this, i never let these opportunites pass by. So yeah i still contemplating on visiting the gallery in the art science museum. Its a lot of hard work creativity and patience. cause i can never imagine myself sculpting such a huge piece of artwork with million lego bricks it would drive me nuts. Maybe if the lego bricks were 10x larger, i may consider. haha and even as a teenager he makes me think that LEGOS are cool (: & they are not just toys we chew or bite.

Recently i have been sneezing a lot.

Its either i'm garnering more dislikes around me or simply i'm falling sick and sneezing is the best symptom to prove it. Because i may be weird but i rarely or barely sneeze once a day or even wheeze at all. Everyone around me is falling sick during this crucial period of midterms and its worrying! :( But it seems pretty helpless too cause theres nothing much to be done to prevent these virus for attacking ( maybe if I'm asleep now something could actually be done ) hahahahahah !

Anyway,Yes! the End of this week marks the end of some tests for my mid terms !

2 test: one theory and one practical ain't considered proper midterms.

and Nursing's not only that.

i got more reflection essays to come and they are as long as business reports.

i got two upcoming projects/presentation to complete before i can take a breather.

One thing's for sure its not going to be easy getting through it but the spaced out deadlines indeed helped a lot in relieving some stress i have on my back. 

Today's practical was truly memorable.

i still think its amazing to hire real simulated patients to act accordingly to the case scenario for us to be assessed on. Though i'm secretly annoyed when my patient kept bugging me with questions while i was trying to recall my steps watch my movements as well as trying to ignore the scrutinising from the assessor. But hey it was interesting because it will also happen in real life situations and i'm glad i get to experience them now so i wont fumble when i am doing my clinical. Still, my own assessment was pretty bad because there was so much room for improvement if there was less nervousness and anxiety battling in my brain. 20 minutes never felt so short ever. If i am going to fail, yeah upset i may be but under that circumstance i can never imagine how much better i could have done. Trying to type out some self reflection here so i wont be stunt when i try to attempt my reflection a week later!

I will be going to danzpeople tomorrow (YAY) and to watch Jaja with germs (double YAY) :D

i miss that place so badly i'm still thinking of making it as a bait to motivate me to work even harder for eoy examinations. HA. 

Well not much updates for now, Its october already. LIKE seriously i don't even know how sneaky time could be. and soon all my cousins will be free from examinations stress and torture of mugging daily (: while i will continue nursing to end of december. well, not a very sad thing actually HAHA.

Nothing much coming up maybe a guitar dinner gathering ? and maybe steamboat with uni peers? and buying vans with love? hmmm waiting dilah to be back ! 18/10 cycling outing SOON (that never comes -.-) ? yesh my 19 ! hahaha nothing to wish for actually :) got everything i need & want < better brains maybe>. more meditations/classes please [im being super lazy in my religion these days ... grrr] tough choice between dance and religion. 

Alive

 Merchandise long queue hot sun

cafe latte

baby you belong to me

Alive for BB

With our pretty lightsticks

Free blue light bangle

 Yes. Its today.
28/9 its finally happening.
I couldn't feel the hype or atmosphere and even suspected i lost the craze and love i used to have for them.
4 years, LOL its neither a short nor long time but non of my r/s ever surpass this amount of time.
But yet it lasted for this group of boys/men/guys(cause to me they show all 3 characteristics) whom i known  pretty well enough yet i'm just a stranger or another fan to them. Maybe thats why admiring last cause u never know the result if the other party doesnt give you an answer. (:
Who cares what so ever,
i finally get to meet them today, tonight.
well i could see their faces so clearly and every single one of them looked better than on youtube videos.
their voices sounds real and way better live.
They play very well during concert and maintains professionalism i guess it comes with experience
Their music is DAMN good.
They are so cute real live too who cares who they really are in their personal lives
But this is the big bang ive seen 4 years ago and still seeing now :D
They have grown definitely, the change is obvious and effects are showing in the market over the 4 years.
They know what we want to see and they do it well so we love them more (:
I had FUN, Laughter, Tears, Sexy time and many random murmurings that my poor friends or random VIP have to endure. I practically lost control of myself cause i didn't know what i was babbling already.
I didn't know or recall what i said. Those are words i couldn't find if i watch it true dvd/ youtube videos.
Not only the concert was awesome the pre concert was a fun.

i had fun watching people put on extensions to resemble GD, we had tattoos on our necks, we took photos with our crown lightstick that i always always yearn to own one(coolest in the whole world ^^),we listened to samsung phone advertisement so that we could get free big bang merchandise , there were guys going around offering drinks to prevent dehydration, awesome and high company to watch with , going back with dear and friends and people giving out free banners .Lastly big bang fans are cool cause they dress really well with me as an exception ! anyways it made up for my not so good morning after reaching KLP at 9 for nothing and spending 5.50 for cafe latte which i didnt like at all. :/ and the pretty long wait not to mention the killer sun and the series of unfortunate events. But it was all worthwhile in the end. i swear i have never perspired this much in my lifetime. Everything was drenched head to toe and i feel like a giraffe after tonight. toned a lot of muscles in the event too. and soome VIPs were really great they offered to film the video for me cause maybe my armpit didnt smell that good or maybe i was pathetically vertically challenge in anyway he offered his service what a helping stranger !

the feeling was so overwhelming that i was moved to tears during haru haru. Top was really putting in a lot of effort for his injured right hand. Dae had the best smile i've ever seen from him. Tae was so generous with his body or should we say fan service and words. Ri was the cutest as usual, going around comfortably treating the stage as his home. My leader was the best rapper i've ever heard in my live i could feel the sincerity although i felt him shying away from the stage or sensed his lethargy or should i say lack of the GD-young boy-smile.

Tonight, such a beautiful night i felt like i was in heaven.
they are a bunch of bad boys and fantastic babies
saying last farewell gave me blues
but i'm feeling high high and i was knocked out

Post concert hyperventilating

NOTE: THIS IS PHOTO DOES NOT BELONG TO ME.

Anyways, i can't wait to get the latest 'Happy' collection from kikki.k . The designs are simply classy and beautiful.Totally. its so hard to resist (:

well  moving on, really want to try to be involved in next year's camp because i'm not choosing to go for any overseas or summer exchange trip YET. Can't wait for the experiences and opportunities lying ahead. Everything seems so interesting and i just want to experiment with all i could in my short 3 years stay :D so once again university life is pretty amazing.

well, but there   is always the tough part like  confidence issues, sensitivity and finding true friends.  All takes time and its part and parcel of the growing process i guess . Just have to self remind that i can't let my emotions go on a roller coaster ride all the time cause it takes a huge toll on my performance regardless academically or socially or anything. MOOD and feelings are just things that are not nice to play with. So HS learn to MAINTAIN. have a more calm and confident mind !

well i'm missing danzpeople already like super badly . not that i'm not enjoying dhopps i  love the feeling emitted from the people there its like welcoming me  to join a big family to welcome me to share my passion somewhat like nursing (:

whee he cant wait for the class tee and pullover design already!

and have i mention, i really love nua-ing at home on alternate thursdays. feels like a real good break  for me :D

last but no t least acted crazily, tore  my  A&P book into chapters for better revision purpose  . heat ache so badly i had my mum to do the execution for me. YAY swimming is starting all over again. wow can't wait to swim faster than before and feeeeeeel all the muscle aches again !

handled up my first official assignment. It was a tough nut to crack ma SWEATS. glad i didnt do last minute work u know  BUT errors are still prevalent everywhere -,-

About there, BIGBANG concert coming up soon.  should be more interesting by then !

cant wait to prick people's  finger this sat HAHAHAH :D

Lotus Flower Bomb

Finally found the music that Blast! used during their dance marathon. but so what, i didn't pass the auditions. AH-HA not that bad this time round. More accustomed to accepting failures during dance practices. feels like part and parcel of improving.

^ not my photo. its from facebook really cute really applicable.

Supposed to be sleeping now but can't seem to get a matter off my mind. its annoying but hard to put it to words. how should i say. When someone criticizes me i hate it (not the person but the matter or action of doing it) genuinely hate it or triggers my anger button because it hurts my pride? i know it yet you have to amplify it? i don't need u to teach me how to do my things? u are someone i hold dearly to? i feel embarrass ? or because i'm finding excuses for myself and trying to hide the matter beneath the blankets? yeah. all this should be the reasons why i was feeling depressed, unconfident, angry, ridiculous, skeptical. I question the motive for the criticism. Is it the truthfully wanting the best intentions for me to change for the better or simply just ranting and my matter just gave you the best opportunity to do so. And how much criticism is healthy dose? I guess its Subjective and depends on what matter it is. But if I actually felt quite insulted by the harsh remarks used does that mean the criticism has gone overboard? What if its because of the criticism plus other actions that someone did that made me decision biased? Its often questions like this that i never anticipate hits me and i go nuts trying to find an answer that would be fair for both parties. Its like the RIGHT or WRONG question i once mentioned. Who draws the line and be the judge to tell u if you have gone too far overboard of fine? Theres no law in two people's relation with one another. Just how much would one sacrifice compromise or even change just so as the bond between them never gets broken even if the change seems unreasonable or simply NO reason for them to do so. whoops jumping from criticism to change.
Well typing this doesn't give me any answer but it kinds of sort out my thoughts better and more importantly deposit these feelings in this chunk of words that hold them as secret so i don't have to carry an extra burden with me till similar incident occurs and remind me of this again. So i guess the answer wouldn't be coming from me alone cause it has to depend on the other party too.

whoo its a FRIDAY tomorrow! my class ladies are playing BBALL !

So looking forward to the weekends. Feel like i need some exercising and stretching.
well, Nursing's awesome cause i can't can't wait for the SUMMER EXCHANGE PROGRAMS + OCIP TRIPS :> At least i got dhopps and danzpeople for now -satisfied- :}

Forgot to give special mention to my all time favourite GD (:
well that talented man just released two really awesome music. SWAG+STYLE (: rare to hear his smexy voice in That xx plus his super attitude yet addictive rap in One of a kind. why does he keep getting better only? tried not to be bias but this two songs are really good high standard hahas. love his crazy mv as always :D and his grins that never gets exhaustive. (: strive to improve like him :D

University

And so August marks the start of my university life :D
Before i know it i'm thrown into the repeating cycles of checking nus mails for updates, IVLE for new notes, Hotmail for cca information and non-stop printing notes. I must say its really expensive all the notes, textbooks and all equipment :O. Everything requires cash and each time is like 100 bucks minimum. Its only the first week of school but i must say its pretty hectic already. Glad that i'm still coping it well for now! For the first week, i have gone through many days of 4 hour back to back lectures, been to the anatomy hall with lab coats, melt in the voices of some of my lecturers, experience the crowd and squeeze during lunch time in canteens but the food is absolutely cheap it makes me fly, tried archery sport and continued to dance to relieve stress. And there are still many more to come! Im having so much fun :)it will be even more if i stay in hall but there have to be a balance in everything i cant get excellent grades and fun at the same time. My body and mental health doesn't allow me to do so.

one thing thats making me stress these days.
:( swimming test is coming up but i absolutely have no time to practice !! how how. SATURDAY?
I'm supposed to be practicing it today BUT its raining now man.
Should have gone gyming in the morning but i was too tired to get out of bed cause i have no lessons today :D
ARGHHHH procrastination kills. i really dont wanna waste the 90 bucks :( and i dont think my fitness is there at all.Shall get my dear to gym with me after school settles down in a week or so. BY then my swimming test would have passed already -.-

Its alright we still have an upcoming 5km run :D
FIT FIT FIT HS. my abs were almost popping out already :(

Anyways feel thats like an invisible line that i draw for myself in everything i do so that i  wouldnt lost control of it. But for dance i'm afraid im not able to do so. cause letting lose and losing control is what i have to do. Thats the hardest part for me. I love it as much as im afraid of it. Afraid that i would be change. Afraid that the change would hurt people around me and Afraid that change is permanent. But it isnt time to give up now. I have big dreams for it. is there a way thats possible to enjoy it while resisting any form of changes during the process  or should i just embrace it and see how far it could take me for once? its too late to let go now cause i have started and i'm lovin' it i can't turn back cant retrieve those feelings that are held back for too long. Dancing shall be my second boyfriend :D. It makes me happy and takes me to wherever i want to go.so, i'm just going to keep dancing on & on. whoo this paragraph doesnt make sense. ps. Only i will understand my own language.

Anyway i don't understand why are the pimples on  my forehead coming back when im past 18 already. HORRORS. Its either the HAIR DYE or the FACEWASH. own up one of you :<

I bought Nike dunk for 29.90 :D at warehouse sale. LOVE IT TTM k. i think there will be like 50 pairs in the future. okay shall not be crazy here.

Snippets of my life (:

^ after RAG day went vivo for marche met a pw group :D

^ OG outing at Jcube after matriculation day ! :D

^ creative gingerbreadman float during rag

^ funny how camera focus on them but not me :( haha at the GARDENS by the bay

^ during our flag day at AMK hub :D rest rest

^ come and see my buddhism camp (:

^ met up with wifeys for teoheng before dinner

^ retarded things we do in daiso MUHAHAHA.