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o boy, i really do love his voice :)
Let me see how is it even possible to describe how i'm feeling now.

Its like 100000000pounds laying on my heart.

it feels like nothing you do is going to make things right again

like no matter how hard you can try and u still remain there

and im getting tired of telling myself there is still glimpse of hope if u hang on

its like endless crying will not cure that pain and unhappiness

no matter how many times i shake such negative thoughts away it comes back to me again

its recurring, i know i brought it upon myself

but u cant help it right when every single thing happening around you just prove that u are worthless

This depression feeling has been here all along since year 2.

Its crazy right, like how i can hold on for so long and not crumble yet.

since i can tell im a little depress i guess my condition aint that bad yet.

i know she sees this. both of us are hurting like nobody business

But i know its essential for us to grow. Hang in there my dear, will text as soon as i have time

Dont misunderstand, i still love school cause i love friends and yeah learning But i dont know why the process of understanding them better seem so difficult. Must start to get to know them better :>

On the lighter note, Adam lambert has been on my favourite list

Perhaps its the song he sings i can relate them well with how im living now :D

yeah on Sat its my JTS yet to get my dear JUNIOR a present.

O god a sat wasted + my snail speed when will i complete my work o_o

hahahaha anyway bad mood always recently and its no good cause what im feeling is starting to show during school hours. :O

i have mmy dears to stop me thinking about it. so i guess it wont be that bad right.

FIGHTING. :)

POSITIVE/ NEGATIVE ^2 gives u positive too :DDDDD

everyone is so supportive dont wanna let them down :(

But can i do it?

Have you lost your way?
Livin' in the shadow of the messes that you made
And so it goes
Everything inside your circle starts to overflow

Take a step before you leap
Into the colors that you seek
You give back what you give away
So don't look back on yesterday

Need you now.

whoo i really enjoy Lady Ant's music :)

their lyrics are always so sweet and real.

Lol and wont they form a love triangle ?!

its so hard not to fall for her right.

Yesterday and Friday was a bad day.

But i'm glad its over already. :)

Too many things happening in a day.

so many people hurting because of my unthoughtful actions

The feeling of letting everyone around you down is just so awful.

Especially if they are a part of you.

Because when they hurt, you hurt too.

No one is updating me about korean wave concert ! :(

my YG family is back in korea already.

Wonder if they will ever come back again!

and how long will it take for the 5 of them to be united once again.

biology is absolutely a crazy subject

I have to devote all my time to you

and what about the others

SO SELFISH :O

hope prom goes well!!

Hope the table matter will be settled soon ;<

and its really a small small world. :)

And I wonder if I
Ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time :D

Bad Day.

today suck. :/

Always be my baby

Feeling kind of down at first.

I guess its the stress, discomfort and pressure thats causing my indigestion.

well, glad that the torturous moment was over

cause whenever i had a thought, i felt like puking :/ even when i was eating.

haha weird to say but this time Guitar saved me ;D

i picked it up and strum a few songs

and wakaka the feelings mentioned above vanished

feeling kind of peaceful and calm now.

like its telling me everything is gonna be okay. :)

so i believe all things happen for a reason. ;)

and they are definitely not for the bad if we think of it as a good thing.

like why i re-joined guitar after 4 years.

Never knew i loved it so much and now he has a name .

Short name: Mr G , Full name:Mr G.raffe :)

Lol my pres. made me name it :D

like why a friend can appeared out of nowhere

and enter your life making me realise that

he will be there for me whenever things are bad. :)

like why she has always been there for 2 yrs.

Cause she will be the one walking with me till the end of my JC journey.

watching me, laughing with me, cheering me on

like why i have such a kind class

That affirms me that i had never regretted taking this path

cause they made life easier for me :D

except for the being too smart part! haha.

I have been searching for the 'they' in the lyrics

i was so afraid i couldnt even find one.

and realise that i have them all around me

and its all i need to reach my dreams.

and they are the first ones who make me learn that i wanna cherish them

and protect them with all my heart cause they are so dear to me.

This time i'm not afraid to give my heart to do whatever it takes to keep them close

cause i know they wont break it and they deserves it :)

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing

Just when you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can

All this will pay off, i make sure it will :)

ANYWAYYY I NEED A DOSE OF HARRY POTTER !

cant believe its ending

my favourite childhood movie :(

i have watched them grow through every movie.

i cant believe everything has its end.

Thats why there are always new beginnings.

HHAHAH SO POETIC/ inspirational today :D

No Boundaries

whee i really love transformers.

Though i'm like situated at the 4 row side and the movie was like uh 2 hrs 45 min.

but it was still a good one.

I said it resembled power rangers but better version of it.

but my friend says not.

Still, it was a great movie and im glad it didnt fall short of my expectations

cause u know the feeling of watching a great movie :)

it feels so good (:

and haha i got a free Massage after the movie what more can i ask for :D

k and i did something really significant during the weekends

forget about the homework and stuff.

Xing and I signed up for this crazy elective known as climbing via ferrata and abseiling.

seriously, i have never done such a strenuous and life threatening activity in my life.

and i doubt i willl ever have the guts to lay my hands on those rungs again.

Heres the summary !

-30m high/ 4 stories high?

- Metal rungs

-some safety gadgets and my favorite lobster claws

-smelly helmets haha

-Gloves.

thats all u need to climb and of course your guts & your partner ;D

so heres what i did. put on safety gadgets, listened closely to the instructions, held on to my dear life , praying deeply, shivering like a pig at every pause,didnt dare to even tilt my head to see my progress, gathered their motivations, sweat like i ran a 10km race, teared and thoughts of giving up but im in the middle of no where, got confused with my left and my right.Thats what u can anticipate, muscle sore and its hard to propel body upwards and forward cause i fear of falling - but the point is I DIDNT GIVE UP AND STILL MADE IT TO THE END RIGHT. :D

so that wasnt the end k.

Whats awaiting is the abseiling from 30m all the way to the ground.

HAHA the wait was crazzy and i was all ready to chicken out cause there is a lift waiting out there for me and it takes me right down to the 1st story and out of the 12 story building.

but i wont do such a thing cause i PAID for the activity and i wanted to cross boundaries.

:) so with an insane mind i went to try.

WA when i was standing on the wooden board that gives u a bird eyes view of the entire landscape of the building i almost fainted.HAHA cant control my peeeee. Lol thank god the instructors could read our nervous expressions and he started cracking jokes. I didnt realise it at that moment but that trick work on me cause i loosen up and listened to him and talked him and the height didnt matter anymore :) so yeah yx and i get to abseil together :D it was a blast :D quite easy as compared to climbing rocks but the rope burned !! and i lose control several times. But for a first timer i it was not bad except for the pathetic landing where my ass hits the floor with a thud and i couldnt get up at all cause i was hell exhausted.

Well at least i felt accomplished.

I guess i needed an achievement like that to get an aproval of myself

and this came just in time.

Every night before i close my eyes

i would replay the song no boundaries, Desperate for encouragement

and yeah i cry to it every night.

haha studying is not killing me. Its me thats not moving on but at least its better now :D

i think no i mean i can do it and will do it no matter what :D

the songs will help me and someone will be there for me to shoulder my pain.

okayy batt dying.

and life is seriously full of unexpected scenarios its like things happening these days are started to get out of my control

maybe im just letting go and let it lead me while i just follow life.

hahaha just that u never know whats going to come around everytime

and it pops by when u least expect it :D

Great feeling though.peach green tea

haha. Nights.

Stay positive !

Jar of Hearts

Enjoyed my class chalet thoroughly

though the place was hmm really rundown but the people were full of warmth and delightful to be with :D

hehehe and our personal skilled photographer brought his "umbrella" along to beautify the photos :)

shall elaborate more when i have time k

cause im rushing off to shopping ! AGAIN.

GOD I kinda starting to dislike buying things cause i hate it when i have to spend moneyyy :(

oh yeah i wanna catch transformers soon

cause heard it was a nice one !!

and hope my lovely 8 cousins will be able to watch the last part of harry potter with me

since we watched part 1 to 7 together !! so sweeett right :D

hahahaha and i saw a lil girl lock lips with junho ~ Envious ttm :D

he is superrrrrr cute :B

me tooo JUNHO!

kkkkk anw i just started on Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami :)

used my blood sweat savings to buy k :D

hope it will be a good one !

since i eyed it for a long time already :D

:}

HANDS UP

Oh yeah.

JCT's over. It sucks big time. U's are not unfamiliar anyway. :/

Anyway, enjoyed myself with crys & adi at ice skating ring yesterday

i felt i did a great job coaching them hahahah they could move !!

Later , it will be our first time ever spending a night together with the class at a chalet.

yx say many staying over.

Omo Ultra excited and delighted !!

gonna spam photos like hella.

My teacher's the best he ordered like tons of food for us and its free

the only pity is that he cant join us :(

its okay i believe there is manyyy more to come :D

poor me have to attend tuition tomorrow

im so gonna die and after that im going shopping somemoree !! :O

first money lost ;second sleep gone.

i really love jiyongie (: actually the entire YG :)